(DOWNLOAD) "Don't Feed the Narcissists!" by Laurie Endicott Thomas * Book PDF Kindle ePub Free
eBook details
- Title: Don't Feed the Narcissists!
- Author : Laurie Endicott Thomas
- Release Date : January 13, 1961
- Genre: Family & Relationships,Books,Nonfiction,
- Pages : * pages
- Size : 3944 KB
Description
For the past few decades, some prominent psychologists and educators have been urging us to boost children's self-esteem at all costs. In contrast, all of the world's great religious traditions warn us that pride is a sin and that humility is a virtue. In Don't Feed the Narcissists!, Laurie Endicott Thomas explains the golden mean between these two extremes: the Greek philosopher Aristotle argued that one's self-esteem should be accurate. Narcissists are people who are trying to occupy a higher social rank than they can successfully defend. They want more power, property, and prestige than other people are willing to give them. As a result, narcissists often try to bully other people into submission. For that reason, narcissists can be dangerous. In fact, narcissism may be the underlying motivation in many mass shootings. Narcissists tend to be unhappy. Because they cannot relate to others as equals, their lives are empty. They often try to fill that emptiness with excitement. As a result, their lives can spin out of control. Many psychologists believe that narcissists are secretly suffering from low self-esteem. But by definition, narcissists are people with overly high self-esteem. Narcissists worship themselves and expect everyone else to worship them, too. Narcissists often seek out people who will submit to their will. These acts of submission are called narcissistic goods or narcissistic supply. If you show anything less than perfect submission, or if they are jealous of you for any reason, narcissists may feel that you are challenging them for their social rank. The discomfort they feel in this context is called narcissistic injury. The narcissist may then become aggressive, either to get people to submit or to eliminate the object of their jealousy. This aggression is called narcissistic rage. Yet this misbehavior often causes the narcissist to lose social standing. Narcissists want to be large and in charge. Yet they lack the intellectual and social skills to earn the high social rank that they so desperately desire. Their continual games of king-of-the-hill cause problems at home and at work. Psychiatrists have had little success in treating narcissism. Narcissists seldom realize that they need help, and they are unlikely to take constructive criticism from anyone, even a trained therapist. Thomas suggests a novel approach for helping narcissists: offer an educational program that will help them achieve the greatness that they desire. Most of the training should be done by computers, and in private. Even narcissists like computer games. To achieve the greatness they desire, narcissists need to learn some lessons from the seven classical liberal arts, especially logic and rhetoric. They need to learn about the seven basic human emotions, as well as the seven deadly sins. They also need to learn how to read an audience, so that they can refine their act. Thomas also has some useful advice for people who are coping with narcissists, at home and at work. She explains how to write yourself out of the pointless dramas that the narcissists generate. In particular, she emphasizes the four C's: You did not cause that person's narcissism. You cannot cure that person's narcissism. You cannot control that person's narcissism. But you do not have to contribute to the narcissism. Thus, the best approach is often emotional disengagement or even avoidance. Don't feed the narcissists! It's not good for you or for them!
 "Don't Feed the Narcissists!" by Laurie Endicott Thomas * Book PDF Kindle ePub Free){kind=link}